Thomas and Adam

Last Winter I coached Thomas' basketball team.  Each practice I picked up his friend and teammate, Adam, on the way and was privy to some great 6 year old conversations from the backseat. 
One particular night of eavesdropping was particularly rewarding.  It seemed that Adam was having a difficult time with a fourth grader that bullied him everyday walking home from school.  He couldn't figure out what to do with this bigger kid.  So Thomas offered his first grade wisdom. 
"Adam, you need to just kick him in the #$*&." 
I was shocked by what he said, so casually and nonchalant.  And so was Adam.
"Thomas, I can't do that!" Adam exclaimed. 
To which Thomas replied, "Sure you can Adam.  They're only this high," holding his hand above the seat to indicate the altitude of the desired target. 
For Thomas it was not a matter of ethics.  It was simply a matter of physics.

Truer Words Have Never Been Spoken

So Thomas is riding in the back seat of my truck as I drive him to flag football practice.  Out of the blue he says, "Dad, you shouldn't have hookers in your truck." 
What?  Surely he didn't just say...
"Thomas, what did you say?" 
"I said, you shouldn't have hookers in your truck.  Mom would be mad." 
My mind was racing.  I could not see him in the back seat, so I had no idea what prompted his seemingly random moral warning. 
At the light I turned around to see him... holding a coat hanger.  The "hooker" in question. 
I was quite relieved that there was no other context for the word in his young mind.  But truer words have never been spoken.